I had a big birthday on Friday. By that, I mean it marked a new decade, not that I had a big celebration. Hey, it’s my pandemic and I’ll cry if I want to. But I don’t want to, so with all that extra party time on my hands, I got you something.

Cue the noisemakers!

Have you ever spent a lonely or disappointing holiday? It’s been a pattern with me. Part of the problem is that I’ve failed to anticipate disappointment and therefore failed to prevent it. All of the sudden it’s Christmas morning and I can’t get a flight home.

Obviously, I’ve been doing it wrong.

But not this time. I was going to throw a big bash. Maybe hold a parade. Conduct a parade? If it was really going to happen, you’d think I’d know the proper verb.

The point is, there was plenty of room for improvement.

But that was then. I’m older now. All it took was half a century and some social distancing to crack this puzzle!

Maybe you knew it all along.

I knew it, too, when it came to job interviews, networking awkwardness, and finding your calling. But I’ve had a big ol’ blind spot when it came too close to home.

Want in on my newfound wisdom? It’s pretty simple. It goes a little bit like this:

Be the day-maker.

Don’t wait passively for someone to make your day or decide your worth. Bring your own sunshine to the job interview, shine it on your interviewers. Help to ease other people’s nerves at a networking event by introducing yourself, asking sincere questions, inviting other wallflowers into your orbit. And definitely don’t wait for someone to hand you your calling. They’re just as likely to tell you you’d be a fool to even dream of something better than that soul-sucking ill-fitting job. Sometimes you’ve gotta dig deep and make your own way.

So don’t check the mail box three times on your birthday. Send cards. Give gifts. Create something generous and wonderful for your community. Make your own damn day by making others’.

Guess who’ll benefit from my newfound insight? Me! And YOU!

But no peeking. Like all the best presents, you’ll have to wait just a bit.